We all have, at some point in our lives, craved a change. A better life. A better body. A better career. Just something MORE. Then we start researching on How To's and taking a lot of action by learning from all kinds of courses, getting on diets, and taking gym sessions. But in the end, that "big change" never comes and we just come back to our comfy known lives.
What you probably don't understand at that point is that you tried to change your Outer Life without changing your Inner one. What I mean by that is, you want to be rich while your mindset is scarce: you want to lose weight but you believe you’re a “big girl”; you want to start your own business but you think that you’re just not smart enough; you want to leave an unhappy marriage but you believe you’ll be a bad mom if you do that.
The key to any kind of real change is your belief in yourself. That you are deserving of a better life. That you are worthy enough to have all that your heart desires.
When you start feeling deep in your heart that this is the right thing to do and that you CAN DO IT, your mindset and your actions (Your Inner and Outer World) will start being aligned and you will make that change with more ease. Losing that inner mindset resistance is something that will take you to the life you will be proud of living,
You might be thinking right now, “Oh, yes! This makes so much sense. But, how do I do that?!” I got you, girlfriend! Here are 5 steps that will help you start believing in yourself, and ease your resistance to growth and expansion.
1. Check Your Thoughts
Everything starts with our thoughts, with our beliefs about ourselves and life in general. That is actually a great thing because we are able to control and change them.
You know what that voice in your head says…
You can’t do it. You’ll never be good enough. You’re going to fail.
Self-doubt creeps upon all of us, but it’s important to notice it right away and stop letting it derail us.
Start training your mind with positive affirmations...
I CAN do it. I AM good enough. There is NO SUCH THING AS FAILING, only the opportunity to learn and start over.
“Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.”
― Suzy Kassem
A lot of times you’re not even aware of your limiting beliefs because you take them as facts, as something that is so TRUE and there is just no changing it. That is the biggest lie your mind is telling you. EVERYTHING can be changed, including your mindset. I have a free eBook that is specifically written for that reason, to help you identify and change your limiting beliefs so you can finally start creating the results you wanted. Grab it here.
2. Ease Your Doubts
After you become aware of your doubts and limiting beliefs - write them down. Take a journal or a piece of paper and make 3 columns.
In the first one, you put down all of your doubts, everything that you feel is blocking you or standing in your way.
In the second one, you write everything that is in your power to do, what is in your area of influence, all the actions you can take that would bring you closer to your goal.
And, in the third column, you put everything that you feel needs to happen but is outside of your control. You can imagine that third column as something you’re giving out to God or Universe to take care of it, almost as a prayer.
Now, focus on column no. 2, on what is in your control to make it happen and start taking steps towards it.
3. Stop Listening To What Others Have To Say
This is probably the hardest thing to do because we’re naturally social beings and need that connection, that understanding from someone when we want to pursue a change in our lives.
A lot of people are blessed with beautiful and supportive friends and family, but what if you’re not one of them? What then?
What I can tell you from personal experience is that lack of understanding and judgment from other people hurts like hell.
I can try to make it sound nicer but this is a simple truth. There were so many times in my life that I chose a path to a better life that ended up me being alone in my pursuit, with my (then) friends talking behind my back about how crazy I am. But that never stopped me. I pushed through all the loneliness and rejection and built a life I’m proud of now. And so can You! If you really want it bad enough, you’ll ignore what they have to say because IT’S YOUR LIFE and you’re the ONLY ONE who has a say how you’re gonna live. It’s YOUR CHOICE. Make a good one.
“Don’t let others tell you what you can’t do. Don't let the limitations of others limit your vision. If you can remove your self-doubt and believe in yourself, you can achieve what you never thought possible.”
― Roy T. Bennett
4. Take Small Steps
Every journey starts with a first step. And then another. And another.
Every person that inspires you took a lot of those small steps to get where they are now. The same will be with you. You have to focus more on your journey than the end result because any really worthy change or goal takes time. So, to get there, you have to fall in love in the process.
I know that we live in times where everyone is bombarding you with quick fixes, but that is not the way to a true change. No matter how fast you want to lose that extra 20 lbs or make a 6-figure income. If you're really honest with yourself you can probably hear your intuition screaming that to you every time you're considering buying some magic solution. To really, truly become the person who you aspire to be, you have to change your mindset and your lifestyle, and there are no 30 Days To Do It for that.
"Small steps work—grandiose goals don’t."
― Sonia Choquette
Know what you need to accomplish each day and do it. Check things off. This also helps you feel less overwhelmed with life. Some people have so much meaningless information coming at them, they get overwhelmed and give up. They sit on the sofa and don’t do anything. Get a list and knock things off each day.
5. Allow yourself to try…and try again
Self-doubt never disappears. Over time, you just get better at dealing with it.
It will show up every time you fall out of your comfort zone and whenever you strive to do something new. But understand that it’s not something you have to fear or resent. Your doubts are only thoughts, not your future.
Sure, something may go wrong. But if you never try, you’re losing an opportunity to improve your life. Life is too short for that. Most of the things we worry about don’t really matter. Just go for it.